So with that out of the way, I can turn to the latest thing to have caught my attention: phones, iphones and SMRT phones.

With the much-hyped release of the iphone 4, I finally got around to thinking that perhaps I should upgrade from my doorstop/brick/bottle opener (with phone functionalities) and join the early 2000s. If you had’ve asked me 15-20 years ago if I would perceive that I would later become a ‘technological laggard’, I have a feeling the answer would’ve been firmly in the negative. After all, my family trail-blazed with the Apple IIc back in the early 80s, we were in the first wave of Sega Megadrive owners in Bonny Hills (more a ripple than a wave) and I was one of the first Bonny Hillbillies to enjoy the light-speeds of 56.6Kbps internet (at my neighbor’s). I’d burnt the snake oil, rearranged the goat’s intestines and gazed upwards to observe birds of carrion and the auguries were positive!

So what happened?

Malcolm Gladwell, in his book The Tipping Point, talks about technological adoption as part of a larger discussion of social epidemics (a précis is found here, including a very sophisticated graph). Leading the way are the innovators and the early adopters. To make generalisations, these guys are the ones that always update to cutting edge technologies (even though they may still be a little bug-ridden); they line up for hours to upgrade to the latest gizmo or iWhatsit and (probably) bemoan the mass uptake of the technology that they’d discovered so many eons earlier. Not to refrain from sweeping generalisations, they’re probably also the guys that can’t wait for Tomb Raider 3D to come out, so they can finally marvel (in cinemas, and later in their own company) at the eye-popping extent of Lara Croft’s assets.

You then have the early majority and late majority, who are the ones that have probably purchased a phone between 4 years ago and last year that – at the very least – has web browsing, social media, a camera. Some of the late majority may not yet have upgraded but are a good bet to do so when their next 24 month plan winds up.

Then, bringing up the rear are the technological laggards. In preparing this treatise, I’ve realised there aren’t too many positive words that end in ‘-ard’: dullard, braggard, retard, wizard… These guys are the ones that are ‘resistant’ to change for lack of a better word or who, for whatever reason, haven’t caught the smartphone bug. There are some laggards that may still not realise that you can send a mini-letter through your phone, who think that ‘VHS is just fine and dandy thank you very much’ and find obsolescence the greatest driver of technological advancement.

While I’m certainly not a ‘tail-blazer’ in this sense, I admittedly have not jumped on the sooper-phone bandwagon as quickly as 9 yr old me may have thought. Whysat?
1) You pay a premium to be an early-innovator/adopter. And with the latest round of smartphones only available on 24month plans, you can be sure that you’ll be thwacked when you have to pay off your ‘old’ iphone4 in 12 months time for the ‘new’ 24month planned iphone5 or iphone-alternative. Not to mention the plans that are bundled with the phones are not really that cheap.
2) Smartphones are expensive – $750-$1250 outright for the latest models. That’s a trip to Bali for 2, a laptop, or a new DSLR.

The first two objections are obviously related to my fiscally prudent Scottish heritage and thus couldn’t really be helped… the next observations I was able to make of my own volition, unswayed by heritage and bloodline.

3) There’s no iPhone killer currently on the market. iPhones are great, don’t get me wrong; I just don’t necessarily subscribe to the strictures that Apple imposes to ‘encourage’ users to use the entire Apple suite of products. The Android-based (is Google any better?) phones have come a long way and each has its relative merits and downsides, but none shine down upon us with an all-conquering halo of non-Apple goodness…
4) Lastly, I think I primarily need just a phone… I appreciate the lure of 1,000,000 apps (999,900 pointless and 100 good ones); I understand the appeal of instant connectivity to news/social media/online banking/flight check-in; I’m in awe at the fact that the latest phones have faster processors than desktops we were using not 10 years ago… but… do we need that every waking hour of our lives? Internet is ubiquitous in my house and my work. The only time I’m not connected is on my 15 minute ride to/from work, when I’m in the pool/beach, asleep and snoring or out and about on weekends… while I’ve certainly been caught out before (phoning my flatmate, providing my bank details and asking him to exchange cash to my keycard – and hopefully not to an additional accout in the Caymans), I do enjoy the tech-free human element of these times and interactions…

So…

…in sum, after my research it appears that – iphone4′s are great; in fact iphone 3GS’ are great (and probably cheaper if you can live with having last year’s item). HTC’s phones are likely to keep on throwing (and landing) punches for the Android platform into the future and comprise good viable alternatives. The Samsung Galaxy S is a great phone – with a few unfortunate failings – that would probably serve all of your immediate smartphoning needs and then some. **These are all mini-PCs with phone and text functionality; correspondingly make sure that you have a good daily phone charging routine.**

As for me, the Nokia E63 will suffice for 12 months, when I shall peruse the landscape once more and see how far behind us laggards are. I think the E63 is a smart phone because I can charge it every 3-4 days, I can do internet banking/flight check-in at a pinch, it doubles up as a torch, and on a $29 cap I’ll never have to refrain from sending Storm a reply-text for fear of running out of pre-paid credit.

And just remember, you early-innovators need people like me… after all, innovation is relative, and if you don’t have us laggards, how will you be able to see how far you’ve really come, condescendingly smile inwardly/laugh outwardly/tweet profusely at how further advanced you are than some of us, and justify in your mind the premium you pay to remain that way, at the front of the innovation curve…?

I have put a redirect page at the old location so even if you go there by habit/mistake (this is more for me than anyone else) you’ll be redirected to the new address – you wouldn’t even know you were lost.

There should be no change for email subscribers or anyone for that matter, but if you stumble on an as-yet-undiscovered quirk, please let me know.

I guess the googlebots might be a bit confused with the new set-up but fortunately I’m not faced with too many competitors in the Google ‘Jameses’ term stakes…

Thanks to the people who provided feedback on the ‘Week Without’ or as Cathy proposed the ‘week with’ – which has a decidedly more positive spin and advocates filling your week with positive activities and tidbits, rather than remove things that are ‘bad’… both sides of the same coin I guess…

Oh, and lastly, I’ve been invited to interview for the Senior Policy Officer pool at my current work. In fact, my current job will be drawn out of said pool (due to restructure). So thankfully, I’m not so shit that they won’t consider me for my own job!

Much love…

If I can do a ‘week without’ booze. What else can I go for a week without…? What are the activities that I feel are relatively indispensable in my daily and weekly routine…? Could I go without them with relative ease…? If I can’t, can I go without them at all? And, might I learn a thing or two if I try a weekly schedule of abstention from a range of things…. Let me just get it out of the way early – this does not relate to sexual activities, nor to activities that I never do, and thus would be very easy to refrain from doing…

So some options are: ‘a week without’-
* caffeine;
* hitting the snooze button;
* swearing;
* asking for a favour from someone;
* making a promise i don’t keep;
* making excuses to not do something;
* take-away or dining out;
* leaving the kitchen untidied after meals; and, lastly
* eating food that has been processed in any way.

I’d be interested to hear if anyone has any other ideas for stuff to try. I think the last one would be very, very difficult. Think of almost all the foods you eat beyond fresh fruit and veg. Dairy, pastas, white rice, cereals, bread, sauces, oil, condiments, meats, etc… the list is nigh on endless. Even something as benign as soy sauce or milk would be off the list. I’m not even sure if lentils or other dried beans that could’ve been used in a soup would pass the test, on the basis that they’ve presumably been dried by some artificial process. (I’m ignoring the fact that picking fruit and slicing meat from a bone is also a process).

It’d be a boring old week: wholegrain rice with fresh vegetables; salt and chilli to taste; potato and corn as my other carbs; and fruit. But one that makes you think, if only for a fleeting moment, about just how far removed our existence is from eating natural foods.

They search for food in tidy rows, first 1 then 10 and yonder goes;
They nomp and omp and chomp my stuff, until I’ve soon had quite enough;

And say to them in calmest voice, I’m sorry friends but I’ve no choice
But to ask if you would kindly leave my food my house and me in peace;

Before you aim to cause a stink, I might have washed you down the sink,
And trust me friends there’s no food there; it’s not that I don’t wish to share

But even with your tiny mouths, the lot of you will soon devour
My meat, my eggs, and all my fish, and that’s against my every wish.

So once again I ask you please!
Switch to honey and bother the bees!

I’d left work early due try and get on top of a headcold, and about 12mins after arriving home, the rain started; then the blackout that was inevitable (according to my boss, the salt encrusts on the power distribution network and shorts it out until it’s duly rinsed off – and rinsed off it was).

Then the hail started, and like a sodden fool playing skirmish with god (and without a gun), I dashed about trying to blanket the car to remove some of the potency of the hail impact. Unfortunately, and welts aside, I was a little late and Storm’s beloved Norman now carries some pock marks for his struggles. Compared with some other cars I saw today, and with others that had windows/screen smashed yesterday, he pulled up alright.

I’m sure a few trusty 10+ year old canines managed to slip off their mortal collars and expired with nerves as a result of the lightning and thunder that carried on for hours. Flooding in the city, traffic at a standstill for hours, mudslides near the CBDs iconic park, and washing wet on the line for the first time in months… it was, in a word… memorable.

Anyways, here are some pics… You’d think I’ve never seen rain the way I’m carrying on, but hey… it was fun!

Norman in the Hail

Hail in the Yardl

Hail the size of hailstones

2nd Front on the way

Green Clouds

Green Clouds2

The Old Shed

Downpour

Driving Home

Chain Rain...

A quick glance at statistics will reveal that I’m near mystic at this game of red and black;
A simple game of eight laden stacks… with four to spare – should you wish to place cards there.
53 straight games without loss – which at first sight suggest three things
I play too much, I work too little and I’m a toss…
For daring to air my love for such a simple sport – a pastime of next-to-no import
Except to those that can’t count sheep, procrastinate or think too deep
And need some time devoid of thought, where patterns reign and victories sort the trapped from the free….

Sell me but a little motivation, help me get some absentation from this most benign vocation that keeps me bound past working hours,
When F2 builds those 8 card towers for one more hit of vice… What!?! No Dice!
A junkie with a monkey on my back – one that’s swathed in red and black – a choice of four suits in which to bury me…
To end my count at 53…

Oh what the hell… let’s go one more, I’m sure as sure as sure, that I’ll be able to stop and walk away, come victory 54…

__________
[Edit - My streak ended on 72... which means the elusive one zero zero still eludes me.]

1) Record some tunes – now a possibility thanks to my new desktop pc, which is proudly running Ubuntu (and Windows 7).
2) Write some more blog posts, potentially with a few about some of the good food and coffee available in Perth. And encourage Storm to put some of her dance vids/pics/thoughts on www.stormyhell.net …
3) Do some research into the best way to communicate to people how much power they consume in the home. I still think visually translating the idea of energy consumption into a standard measure (say 1 x 100w light globe) would be handy. As an example, my Aircon at maximum cooling uses the equivalent of 20 100W globes (or 40c an hour).
4) Investigate how much power different appliances use in my home – in function and in standby – using a Powermate borrowed from work.
5) Work with Storm to develop a collaborative dance piece. My contribution would not be movement based, I’ll give you the tip…
6) Do a quick investigation into how many (parent) companies make everyday products in our home. I have a feeling it would be surprisingly few.
7) Write my children’s story – P.B. Huffletots and Mr Grumbles – oh how cliched
8 ) Go through and organise all of my photos and documents from years past. I’m not sure how much longer I’ll need that blurred photo of half a ceiling fan from one of my drunken forays. Also buy a new lens for my 400D and take some shots around town.
9) See my little nieces play together for the first time.
10) Learn piano and guitar with plectrum…

These are just a few of a bunch of ideas rolling around the grey ol’ sea of mind and matter… We’ll see how it goes

Let’s get the losers out of the way early. Tennis, Table Tennis and Badminton (0/10). Verbal Arguments (1/10) lest people think you are on a train to Alzheimerton. Shopping (0/10) this is irrespective of company, or lack thereof.

There are the things that actually revolve around displaying some sort of ability to your significant other and as such lose effect in their absence: examples include Golf, Body Surfing, Tenpin bowling, and crossover skipping (<5/10). Variations of these are fine to undertake solo: driving range, swimming, Wii Tenpin bowling and normal, boring skipping (all 6-7/10).

One word – SCRABBLE; synonym for destroy, annihilate and/or humiliate. Scrabble loses at least 6 points with the loss of a partner (to ~2/10). That is unless you sit somewhere a little further along the Aspergers spectrum and use the time to hone your abacus-like calculative abilities and make sure that every tile is placed in perfect alignment and that each word score adds up to a Fibonacci number. Interestingly enough, the context of so many scrabble games – namely, a coffee shop and a flatwhite – is relatively unaffected due to the ability to occupy one’s time with a newspaper or with people-watching.

Cooking (4-5/10) loses a few points for a couple of simple reasons. Firstly, cooking is inherently something undertaken for the pleasure of others. We can derive indirect pleasure through the pride of our work or the enjoyment others draw, but we’re not the central focus of the play. Secondly, when you’ve cooked for 2 for over 4 years, you’re not necessarily going to have the presence of mind to alter proportions. As a result, and using tonight as an example, you will be eating honey-soy stirfried veges with ramen noodles for the next 8 consecutive meals. Lastly, so the adage goes “they that cooks, washes up not”. Cook and wash up? Why that’s a travesty, in my humble opinion.

Work (7/10). Odd I know, but with no-one warm and snuggly to have you wishing you remained under covers, it’s a bit easier to get to work on time. Hobbies (7/10) – my most recent one has been electronic circuits. Hobbies often require decent amounts of focussed attention, and are not well attuned to regular interruptions for, say, convivial discussions of one’s day. Keeping in mind that we are inclined to show-off, make sure your hobby task is complete before your partner’s return so they can ooh and aah in all the right places and leave you feeling less of a hermited geek and more of a man… “That’s the best home-made, self-calibrated, unconstrained Theremin I’ve ever seen… I’m so glad you’re my boyfriend! You’ll protect me in this most technological of futures!”…

Anyway, to the good’uns. First the dirty – playing with yourself… on the Playstation (8/10). No guilt, no time limits, no commitments. The only thing that tempers this is that you indeed play so much that you get bored of your games within a much shorter timeframe than otherwise might’ve been the case. Musical instruments or music (8/10). Despite the obvious inclination to impress others with your mad guitar skills, it wears off well before the 4 year mark. As a result, if you’re not doing it for you… why bother? Similarly, listening to music is an intensely personal experience and I do not expect others to share musical inclinations at any given moment. Alone, I control the CD player; in company, I compromise.

Penultimately, and perhaps surprisingly, photo-albums (9/10) – whether it be nostalgia about the times you’ve shared with your temporarily-absent other or a simple inkling to reminisce on some times that existed before you were together. You are the link that binds your photos, and hence it should be your experience. Together, you can only fully share the portion of photos that your partner appears in (or has some link to). Solo, you have total ownership – pride, shame, nostalgia, regret, love, idle remembrance. You don’t need to drive down memory lane all that often, so why not utilise the free time a break provides to wander, at leisure, down paths since forgotten and o’ergrown?

Lastly, for now, exercise (9/10). My poison is an afternoon ride along the river. You can run, climb, do weights, fit-ball, skip, stretch… You’re given an additional incentive in that, upon their return, you can be guaranteed that they’ll think to themselves “has he always been this buff, this hot, this super-mega attractive?” And then you can get back to things we do best in company…

_________________________________________________
I am aware that this list is inconclusive. Notable omissions include: internet browsing, facebooking, blogs (yay!), masturbation (it’s amazing I’ve had time to write this really), fishing, chores, and pub. Given that this piece is now longer than a number of my supposedly scholarly 1st year uni papers, I think I shall wind up…

But not before saying, bring on day 12

We share our new place with 2 third-year dancers (M,F) from WAAPA and an architecture student (M) and it’s now about a 5 minute walk to Storm’s campus. The house is heritage listed and is certainly a little bit further along the spectrum of dilapidation than you might otherwise envisage when you first hear the word ‘heritage’… However, it will certainly serve its purpose for the next 4 months until we ship on to the next locale… As an added bonus, there’s a spare room and a double bed for any westbound visitors (esp, mum and dad, who will be here next month!). As an added, added bonus, we finally have a washing machine of our own!!!

In other news, Storm has been steadily preparing and rehearsing for a week of shows at the Perth Institute of Contemporary Art (PICA) that commence tonight and run through till Saturday. The post PICA party will also be at our new abode, so there’s plenty a’happening!

Alright, back to work… A post-weekend weekend would’ve been sensational but… ah well…

It must really suck being the moderator on a c.h.u.r.c.h bulletin board if you have to deal with thousands upon thousands of spam comments… The need for moderation on online sites is discussed here, in an apparent analogy to ‘real’ life…

So far, Askimet has protected my blog from around 45,000 spam posts – so I guess “Askimet saves better than Kalac too!” it would seem…

Now to delete that post…